May 2013
2 posts
I'm fine, I'm just busy.
Since Zee joined our family, this has been my mantra. I’m fine. I’m just really busy… or I’m just tired… or I’m still trying to learn to balance things, you know?
And it’s not like none of those things weren’t true. They were. But for months at the end of the day, I’d sit on the couch unable to move or to think or to figure out what I should...
February 2013
1 post
January 2013
1 post
December 2012
2 posts
Remembering the Right Things: This is My "One."
Friday morning, 20 first graders were murdered in an elementary school in Newtown, Connecticut. Twenty six and seven year olds.
Eight of them were little boys. Just like mine.
I can’t begin to fathom the grief that those moms felt when they learned they would not be reunited with their child. The horror of knowing the tiny body was lying inside the school until it could be identified and...
November 2012
5 posts
Early morning
It’s not THAT early. 6:20. But it’s Saturday and I don’t have to get up and be anywhere today.
It’s dark. Stupid winter.
I’m feeding Zee.
Bee woke up about an hour ago and he’s in my bed, too.
Mike’s been up for at least an hour. Maybe more. He just got back from taking the dogs for a walk.
Bee just giggled in his sleep. I wonder what...
October 2012
5 posts
Lactating and Away from Baby? My Travel Tips for...
I recently had 36 hours from travel hell as a lactator. I learned a few lessons (I did a few things right, too). I could go on and on — and I may in a later post — about how public spaces don’t accommodate moms who are nursing or pumping. It’s frustrating. Pumping in a bathroom is not dignified. It’s not comfortable. Working, lactating moms are marginalized.
Anyway, enough of...
Travel Gods Turned Against Me
Were the travel gods angry with me? Did I do something wrong? I was invited to present the closing keynote at an entrepreneurship conference in Fresno mid-September. My friend, Caroline, and the Palo Alto Sales Manager, Jason, were also there (Palo Alto Software was sponsoring the conference).
Flying from one tiny airport (Eugene) to another tiny airport (Fresno) is always challenging. Direct...
September 2012
6 posts
Rolling along
We have a roller! Zee rolled from front to back today! A little late, but that’s our fault, not his. We’re not very good about tummy time.
Mama & Papa Bear in Full Effect
… or why we’re “taking a break” from football.
Mike had been frustrated with the head coach of Bee’s football team, which is part of the local league of a national organization, almost since the beginning. His style wasn’t working with the kids (ages 5 & 6). The kids weren’t getting it, weren’t learning anything and it was clear who the...
Taking an Infant to Disneyland: Lessons Learned
Mike was dying to get out of town all summer. It was all I could do to get him to wait until August to make a trip to Southern California and the happiest place on earth.
I’m not going to lie, when I’ve been in the past I have questioned the sanity of parents who bring very small children.
I was nervous about taking Zee. Unpredictability is not my favorite planning variable and...
August 2012
3 posts
My World Revolves Around My Boobs
It’s true. I don’t mean in a “gosh, aren’t my boobs fabulous” kind of way. I mean in a my boobs are responsible for sustaining a life kind of way.
I use a nursing app on my iphone to help me keep track of what time I should expect Zee to be hungry again. And I refer to it multiple times a day. It’s my boob bible.
I’d like to give you a sense of a day...
July 2012
6 posts
Weight
I’m about 12 lbs lighter than I was before I got pregnant. Yay, breastfeeding!
Two Month Update
Newborns change daily. I can see the changes in his face. I can see it in the clothes that no longer fit. I can hear it in his baby noises - he coos and gurgles more intently. He smiles and interacts with people who come into his tiny world view.
Growing Like a Weed.
At his two month appointment this week:
Weight: 12 lbs 12 oz (78th percentile)
Height: 23 inches (58th percentile)
Head...
June 2012
10 posts
Being fully clothed optional
That moment when you look down and realize you didn’t put all your clothes back on after feeding the baby.
… I have these moments several times a week.
Things I've learned about breastfeeding
I’ve read more articles, watched more videos and talked to more people about breastfeeding than I’d ever imagined I would. As part of all that, I’ve learned a few things that I thought I’d share.
The Practical: Breastfeeding is challenging. Very, very challenging. Mostly because it’s painful. Really, really painful.
The latch is key. Just because your little...
Natural, my ass. My breastfeeding journey, part 1....
Breastfeeding is hard. It’s painful, it’s frustrating and it’s (by far) the “mom” thing that I feel most guilty about when I can’t do it. Women have been breastfeeding their babies for thousands of years, why isn’t it working for me? Why doesn’t it come naturally? Why oh why does it hurt so much?
I nursed Bee for about two months. At that point, I...
This. →
Breastfeeding is hard. And this is pretty much my experience right now.
May 2012
17 posts
Peace
I could watch you sleep for hours. In my arms, I study your face, your breath, the tiny fingers that wrap around the edge of the blanket. You’re sound asleep now and don’t stir. I am waiting for you to wake up so I can nurse you and we can both fall asleep. Do not hurry. I know these moments are fleeting. I know I can’t hold you and stare at you forever. But right now, time is...
Week Three: Growth Spurts, Cuddles & Bright Eyes
Having a newborn makes you realize both how fast and how slow time goes. I know this time will be just a blip in the grand scheme of things, but I also know it last for long enough to enjoy it. And I’m enjoying it completely. Without pressures of work or class, I don’t have to stress about not getting enough sleep or not being able to shower until early afternoon. I just don’t...
Bath Time = Happy Time
Zee’s first bath was my first indication that he would be a water baby. He seemed to enjoy the water from the first day.
In subsequent baths he didn’t dislike the process, but was still unsure - he squirmed and grunted.
Tonight he was particularly cranky, and a bath was on the agenda, so i figured we might as well go ahead. It was like magic. As soon as he hit the water he...
Days Like Today
Sometimes I get cocky.
Sure, I can have my ENTIRE family over the day I get home from the hospital and try to coordinate a photo session.
Or today’s version:
Sure, I’ve been feeling pretty good and getting ok sleep, I can work on that site map/web project.
But it’s days like today that remind me why I need time off.
Zee slept fine, but all morning was cranky and...
Wide eyed and taking in the world! Yes, that’s the Chipmunks in the background.